Bluestar Likes LOTR
by Folan00
Summary: Bluestar likes Lord of the Rings (or loves more like it) how far will this obsession go? What will happen when Squirrleflight gets the Iphone 5? Will it be disaster when Brambleclaw finds out about Swiss Rolls? Will the whole Clan go insane when Firestar only talks in olden English. Find out in this collection stories and propose your own characters.
1. Bluestar's LOTR Obsession

**DON'T LIKE DON'T READ! NO HATE!**

**First I have to say something.**

**Folan: Do you want to know the truth about Warriors?**

**Firestar: YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!**

**Folan: Okkkkkkkaaaaayyyyyyy…..well I think you can handle the truth, unlike my fiery friend here…Well I don't own Warriors. I will repeat: I DO NOT OWN I DO NOT OWN I DO NOT OWN!**

**Firestar: That was…..3 times.**

**Folan: Shut up Firestar.**

Firepaw and Greypaw where walking back through the lush green forest after a hunting patrol. Their paws made no sound on the soft green grass as the two toms padded along. Greypaw's whiskers twitched as the sterling's downy feathers tickled his nose. As the neared the camp entrance Greypaw couldn't take it anymore. He dropped the sterling and sneezed so hard he was nearly lifted off of his paws. "AHH! AHHHH! CHOOO!" Firepaw burst out laughing.

"YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" the yowl came from the camp entrance. Firepaw stopped laughing to stared in confusion as Bluestar came out of the camp entrance holding a stick in her paw. "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" she bellowed again, standing on her hind legs and holding the stick in the air as if it was a staff. Firepaw was about to ask why Bluestar was acting so insane when his keen green eyes spotted the Lord of the Rings books next to her paws.

"Bluestar…." Greypaw started to meow.

"What would it be Pippin?" Bluestar asked.

Greypaw flicked his tail, even more confused than Firepaw. "Pippin…?" he said. "What's a Pippin?"

Bluestar rolled her eyes, obviously frustrated. "Fool of a Took!" he grumbled. "You are Pippin of course. You cannot go around forgetting your name." then the flicked her ears towards the camp as Whitestorm yowled: "Bluestar! Spottedleaf needs to talk to you!" Bluestar pretended not to hear him. Whitestorm sighed so loudly you could hear him in ShadowClan territory. "Arwen! Goldenberry wished to speak to you." He corrected himself. Bluestar, or Arwen, Firepaw couldn't decide which one to call her twitched her whiskers happily.

"Coming Aragorn!" she yelled back. Then she turned towards the two apprentices. "Come Pippin and Frodo." She said marching back into camp. She had thankfully discarded her "staff" because she had no more need for its "magical powers" Firepaw looked at Greypaw nervously. "I think her obsession has gone too far..." he muttered. Greypaw nodded his grey head in response. Pippin and Frodo, no sorry, Greypaw and Firepaw followed Bluestar into the camp. Bluestar was showing Whitestorm something and Whitestorm was smiling and nodded like he was humoring a kit. Firepaw walked up and saw that Bluestar had a golden caterpillar around her finger. "Look Whitestorm! Look! It's the One Ring to Rule them all!" she was exclaiming. Greypaw sighed and looked at Firepaw. "At this rate our names will be changed to Pippinpaw and Frodopaw." Firepaw nodded in agreement.

"You are most likely right Greypaw, Bluestar's obsession has gone too far." Then the two apprentices padded up to Bluestar. "Bluestar.." Firepaw meowed. "Your Lord of the Rings obsession has gone too far."

'NO IT HAS NOT!" Bluestar yelled. "YOU JUST WON'T ADMIT THAT I AM AWESOMER THAN YOU!"

"I…don't..know..how…too…respond to that.." Greypaw whispered, staring at his leader with wide, scared eyes.

"Then prepare to face the utmost consequences." Whitestorm said. Then he lunged at Bluestar, trying to grab the books that had caused Bluestar's obsession.

"NO!" Bluestar wailed, trying to keep her beloved Lord of the Rings books away from Whitestorm. "Aragorn! No!" she hissed.

Whitestorm yanked the books away from the grey she-cat. "Arwen yes!" he hissed through gritted teeth. Then the white tom took the books to the river and through them in. When he arrived back at camp Bluestar was staring at the camp entrance.

"Y-you destroyed my books." She whimpered. "W-why?"

"Because you were obsessed." Whitestorm answered simply.

"Y-you destroyed my books." Bluestar stuttered.

"Yes." Said Whitestorm.

After one sad glance out the camp entrance Bluestar treaded over to her den and laid down in there to sulk.

**Author Note: Want your OC cat or a real warrior cat in a funny short story? Fill out this form and post it in your review and I will maybe put your choice in a story.**

**Cat(s) Name:**

**Gender(s) of Cat(s):**

**Description(s) of Cat(s):**

**General Plot of Story:**


	2. Squirrelflight and The Iphone texts

**DON'T LIKE DON'T READ! DON'T LIKE DON'T READ!**

**Folan00: Do you want to know something?**

**Tigerstar: *smiles evilly* I like secrets… Tell meh the secrets.**

**Folan: Umm….ok..I don't own warriors. **

**Tigerstar: That's it. You don't own Warriors.**

**Bluestar: Folan doesn't own Warriors!**

**Firestar: NO SHE DOESN'T OWN ME!**

**Brambleclaw: Just get to the story for StarClan's sake!**

**Folan: I agree with Brambleclaw!**

**AUTHOR NOTE: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE send in your OC cats. Please! Oh and if you are the someone who gave me sugar. *pointed look at the person* just to make me go crazy, if this story makes any one (or the world) blow up because of randomness, it is your fault! XD One more thing, this story (before it gets scarily random) contains a bit of Squirrel and Bramble. SO if you don't like those two together then don't even bother reading this chapter. Do not hate though. I don't really care if you like Squirrel and Ash better. It is my story. I can do what I wish. Oh and I do not own anything mentioned in this stories. Besides the idea. Unless I add my own OC cats. But I will tell you when I have my own OC cats. Oh FYI is not a real email thing. I made it up! teheheehheh**

Squirrelflight raced into camp, her slender legs covering more ground than anyone thought possible. There was one thought running through the she-cat's head: 'has Brambleclaw texted me back yet?' She skidded across the clearing's dirt ground to avoid running over Mousefur.

"Watch it younin'!" the elderly she-cat hissed

"SORRY MOUSEFUR!" Squirrelflight yelled over her shoulder. The orange cat leapt into the warriors den and practically pounced on her green moss nest. She started digging through it, sending mossy clumps flying everywhere.

"Are you remodeling?" A familiar voice chuckled, making Squirrelflight's heart flutter in her chest. She turned around.

"No! I am just looking for something." Squirrelflight said defensively, sweeping her tail to move moss into a pile over her phone. 'No need to check my texts. Brambleclaw is already here' she thought.

Brambleclaw snorted. "Ok.. then what is the reason for tearing up your nest and about half the other nests in the warriors den?" he asked his tail flicking.

Squirrelflight looked around at the mess she had made of the warriors den. She felt her ear tips grow hot. "Oops…" she said apologetically. It was bad enough getting scolded by the deputy of the Clan, but when you have a crush on the deputy, that just makes it ten times worse. After asking her to clean up the mess Brambleclaw left. Then Squirrelflight uncovered her Iphone 4s. She said down on a pile of moss and turned her Iphone on. When the lock screen popped up Squirrelflight unlocked it and went to her: Race Penguin app. It was a very fun game. Very fun. Just as she was about to complete he final level of the game, Sorreltail texted her. The lyrics to "Thrift Shop" boomed out of her phone as the text arrived. Squirrelflight regretted making that her ringtone. Any who, the sudden text startled Squirrelflight long enough for the polar bear to eat her penguin. The she-cat clicked on the Messages app and clicked on her friend's box. The message that had ruined her game was as simple as this.

(Sent By Sorreltail ) Hey Squirrel! How are you? And how are things going with you-know-who. XD?

Squirrelflight replied back:

(Sent by Squirrel&Bramble362 ) -_-

A few seconds later the sounds of Thrift shop barreled out of her phone again.

(Sent bySorreltail ) What's wrong? A_A

(Sent by Squirrel&Bramble362 ) You. Made. Me. Loose. The. Last. Level. Of. Race Penguin. And You don't need to know EVERYTHING ABOUT BRAMBLECLAW AND I! 8-/

(Sent bySorreltail ) 0_o ooooookkkkkkkkaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy then. You don't have to be so harsh about it. L

(Sent by Squirrel&Bramble362 ) :D Do you really really wanna know 'bout Brambleclaw?

(Sent bySorreltail ) ….. Sure

(Sent by Squirrel&Bramble362 ) =) really?!

(Sent bySorreltail ) no. :/

(Sent by Squirrel&Bramble362 ) :O

Then after sending a mental glare to Sorreltail, Squirrelflight went to the immense task of cleaning up the warriors den.

**Ok so I know that wasn't really funny, just more so random but I was board with the story and I wasn't on a sugar high. No matter how hard some body tried. *coughyouknowwhoyouarecough***


	3. Rainpelt's First Encounter With Bluestar

**DON'T LIKE DON'T READ  
Folan: Heya everone! Here is Chapter 3: Rainpelt and Bluestar. (Has her obsession vanished?). Thank you to Echo Scourge for sending in this OC request.**

**Asfur: Quit your yabbering.**

**Folan: *glares* shut it mouse brain. What is Ash's problem lately.**

**Brambleclaw: Ashy is jealous because of the way your last chapter went. :D**

**Ashfur: AM NOT! You are sucha Liar!**

**Firestar (I don't know why I keep picking on him he is my favotite character): FOLAN DOESN'T OWN ME! AND NEVER WILL! SHE ONLY OWNS HER REALLY WEIRD PLOT LINE!**

**Folan: No matter how odd that out bust was. Firestar was right. *yells* Ashfur fix that attitude or you aren't getting a chapter written in this collection of short stories!**

**Ashfur: *goes into a corner to pout***

Rainpelt padded through the ThunderClan territory. The RiverClan tom was here to….hunt…LEAVES! No not really, he was actually fighting the leaves, and trees, and brambles. "HOW CAN THESE MOUSE-BRAINED THUNDERCLAN CATS LIVE IN THIS…DUMP!" he yelled.

"Excuse me?" a voice hissed from the bushes. Rainpelt whipped around trying to pin-point where the voice was coming from. Suddenly a blue furry bullet bowled him over.

"araaapmmph!" he yowled through a mouthful of the grey blue fur.

"What?" the blob of fur asked. When Rainpelt found he could see and breathe again he saw that the blob was actually a sleek blue-grey she cat.

"I said you're sitting on me." Rainpelt said. The she-cat leaped off of him. Just as he was about to get up and run away the she-cat whirled around and walked back, her blue eyes filled with…what was that. Interest…mischief….craziness? Rainpelt didn't want to know.

"So." The she-cat said as she sat down in front of him. "Do you know who I am?" Rainpelt shook his head. The grey cat shook her head in distaste. "I am Bluestar. The leader of ThunderClan." She waited the tom to bow down or yowl: "I am not worthy to be in the presence of ThunderClan!" that yowl, of course never came. "Anyways." she sighed "You insulted my Clan. Therefore we shall have a wrestling match! Loser has to face….terrible consequences. MWAHAHAHA!" Rainpelt rolled his eyes.

"Fine, we shall have a wrestling match." Rainpelt sighed. He was pretty confident. A strong tom like him against a she-cat like Bluestar.

The two cats walked into a clearing. The sun provided light and soft sand covered the floor. Bluestar walked into a corner. Rainpelt walked into another corner. "One…two…" he said hesitantly.

"THREE..FOUR..FIVE!" Bluestar yelled. After giving him 10 seconds to get ready she launched herself at the RiverClan tom. Rainpelt tried to dodge but the nimble she-cat was two quick. He was bowled over..again. She batted him across the ears. He expected to feel claws shred his ears but all he felt was her soft paws. He pushed her off of him. Bluestar who wasn't expecting the sudden counter attack went flying across the clearing. She landed on her side with a 'THUMP' and didn't get up again. Rainpelt walked up to the grey cat. "Bluestar?" he asked worriedly. The she cat flicked her tail. Rainpelt scrambled back. But alas, the she-cat was two quick, for the third time. All he remembered was being tied to a tree stump with a vine.

******30 minutes later*******

"We're taking the hobbits to Isenguard! We're taking the hobbits to Isenguard!"

Rainpelt groaned. "stop..with that song." Bluestar had been singing that song for the last thirty minutes.

"Fine." Bluestar said. Then she grinned evilly. "Did you know that ***these are all true facts* **that the actor who plays Aragorn in the Lord Of The Rings movies bonded so much with his horse during the films that he bought the horse after the filming was done? Did you know that Elijah Wood dressed up in breeches and a flowing shirt and went out into the hills to shoot his audition tape. His friend George Huang, directed the video? Did you know that The large tree that stands above Bag End was built especially by the production department. Every leaf had to be manually attached? Did you know that During filming, most of the members of the Fellowship took up surfing in New Zealand in their spare time. Among them was Viggo Mortensen, who wiped out terribly one day, and bruised one whole side of his face. The next day, makeup tried to mask the bruising and swelling, but were unsuccessful. Instead, Peter Jackson opted to film Mortenson from one side for the entire scene in the Mines of Moria? Did you know that-"

"NO I DIDN'T KNOW THAT John Rhys-Davies, who plays Gimli the dwarf, is the tallest of the actors who play members of the Fellowship. He is 6′ 1!"

After his outburst he sat there and banged his head on a tree as Bluestar rambled on and on about Lord of the Rings.

**I have nothing against Bluestar. It is just really fun for me to have Bluestar obsessed with one of my favorite books. Soooo Echo Scourge.. how did I do on this? Do you like it?**


	4. Ashkit Will Not Shut UP!

**Hola people. You probably all want to kill me for not updating. But this is a update!**

**Disclaimer:**

**Folan: I do not-**

**Squirrleflight: POTATO! NAH!**

**Folan: I don't own anything.**

"BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO! NAH!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
PO-TAT-Y NO CON A MINI DAH NEEK-AH BOO BANANA NEE AAH EEK AAHH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
WHOO NANU FOO LAF-AHH-NU NU FOO BAH BAH BAH BAH NAK-AAHH NOOB-Y TA LOO LOO  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO-OOHH!)  
TAK-ALI NOO BANANA-Y NEEK-AAHH LA LA EEE WUT-TAAA-KEE  
BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAAAHHH! BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO! NAH!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
PO-TAT-Y NO CON A MINI DAH NEEK-AH BOO BANANA NEE AAH EEK AAHH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
WHOO NANU FOO LAF-AHH-NU NU FOO BAH BAH BAH BAH NAK-AAHH NOOB-Y TA LOO LOO  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO-OOHH!)  
TAK-ALI NOO BANANA-Y NEEK-AAHH LA LA EEE WUT-TAAA-KEE  
BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAAAHHH! BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO! NAH!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
PO-TAT-Y NO CON A MINI DAH NEEK-AH BOO BANANA NEE AAH EEK AAHH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
WHOO NANU FOO LAF-AHH-NU NU FOO BAH BAH BAH BAH NAK-AAHH NOOB-Y TA LOO LOO  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO-OOHH!)  
TAK-ALI NOO BANANA-Y NEEK-AAHH LA LA EEE WUT-TAAA-KEE  
BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAAAHHH!" sang Ashkit.

"Ashfur, stop. I am trying to focus." Said Firestar.

"BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (POTATO! NAH!)  
BAH BAH BAH BAH BAH NAH NAH (BANANA!)!" sang Ashkit, refusing to shut up.

**Sorry that it is so short. But I had no inspiration. And no sugar. I just felt like writing.**


End file.
